03. MUSIC INSPIRATION
You’ve been here before.
There are ambitions, good intentions towards making headway. You know exactly what you ought to do. But there sits the filing cabinet fitted with all the data-points you’ve painstakingly searched-out and collected, that are narrative shaping. And before you even realized it, you’ve written your own personal history book titled ‘Successful Proof of Unsuccessful Attempt’. No matter how well intentioned you are about actually doing the thing(s) you intend to, the not-doing has already set. Fixed. Immovable. Permanent. There is no way to change direction. And you can’t catch a breather or break.
A bedroom is as suitable an environment versus any other. It’s the start/end of a day. And it’s so easy to look up at the ceiling; and to think about all of the things that you aren’t doing. And to think about all of the things that can distract you from thinking about, thinking-about-all-of-the-things-that-you-aren’t-doing.
Like the sadness (and honesty) in rain, it can be unbearable. Unavoidable. Even when (especially when) it hurts; the only option is to try, again.